The birth of my brother 22 years ago automatically secured me with a built-in room mate if ever I needed one, and well, the time has come. I asked him some months ago, following me telling Chris I want a divorce, if he would be interested in being my room mate. Three weeks ago I became full-time status at work, thus allowing me to think more strategically about living on my own. Him and I found a place, and will be moving in sometime next week. There are several caveats that come to mind, however:
- Neither of us plan on being in San Diego for very much longer (much to my parents dismay, I'm sure). Referring back to my previous post, I plan on being in San Diego no longer than 1 more year, and my brother will be discharging from the Navy in 2011 to join the Marine Corps.
- Related to caveat 1, we need to decide within the next 6 months if we're going to continue living there until he leaves (meaning I will be paying rent for a place I won't be living in for 3 months and potentially not be going back to at all after I complete Officer Candidacy School).
- We have absolutely nothing to put in our house besides what little belongings we both have, a TV and various game consoles that are rightly his, and a cat that is rightly mine. By some act of God, I managed to secure a mattress and two couches from various coworkers for a small fee. Supposedly it's all in great, gently used condition. At this point, I couldn't give a shit...
- Despite being able to "afford" living on my own, I will be living just within my means. I will be broke for a long, long time, which will make me leaving for OCS that much more meaningful.
But everything about the situation makes those three (and I'm sure there are more...) points completely worth the trouble. Our situation is entirely temporary. Just the fact that I'll be on my own, with my own room and own space, is more important to me than any of the negative aspects that may arise.
Not all those who wander are lost...
...life moves on. I'm still living, still breathing, happy with myself and the choices I've made with my life. Instead of succumbing to the split-second thought "it's 9 in the morning and well, I'd rather stay in bed all day", I realized not a whole lot gets done when you're just laying there. The same could be said for just about everything in life. Every day, I am faced with a situation that proves just how true that is. So I get up, time and time again. Pull back the covers and face the world, because the world will go on without me regardless.
I am on the move. In 3 months, I will be done with nursing school and ready to face the world. I want to join the Navy as a nurse; I am forcing myself to meet new challenges that I never thought I'd ever choose to take on. If I do this, I will be moving to a completely different coast for 3 months, by myself. Who knows what kind of physical and mental challenges I'll go through once I'm there to prepare me for the military life. On top of that, where will I decide to "end up" once I'm done with my training: back to San Diego, stay on the east coast, go overseas? The possibilities will be endless, and I can't wait. This is exactly the kind of thing I've been waiting for, what I've broken away from my old life for. To not only find myself, but to make myself.
The stress, frustration, and anguish of a life gone wrong are dredged up constantly. I need a fresh start to mend this broken heart. Granted, everything that ever happened to me was partially because of me, but it doesn't hurt any less. I look forward to moving on from all of this, creating a new image for myself, and coming home eventually to find that time really does work miracles. At least, that's what I'm hoping for. I will miss my family and friends more then anything, but I'm no stranger to this. For this I am thankful for coming from a Navy family. I am no stranger to change; in fact, I often times crave it. Stability, stricture, and discipline are some things I need. I'm far too spoiled for my own good, I need a swift kick in the ass and a little growin' up to boot. I also want to see the world (for free) and the spare change I'll collect along the way isn't a bad incentive.
Divorce is hard, heartbreak is hard too. But an unhappy life is unacceptable. And I am finally happy.
Does anyone even use Vox anymore?
Today was the shittiest day I've had all year. I do not even understand how so many things can go wrong! Ugh, thanks for the added stress life. You're a real pal, ya know? Well it actually just became funny how so many things were disastrous but I mean nobody wants EVERYTHING to go wrong, you know? Cross your fingers that the power doesn't shut off while I'm writing this.
HOWEVER!!!!!!!!!! I heard something quite amazing today... RASCAL FLATTS IS COMING HERE OCTOBER! Tickets go on sale the 10th I believe and I'm going to be all over that. To go with the awesomeness that is RF enjoy my favorite song...
Sad to see Michelle leave Big Brother but happy Jordan stayed. She'd better win!
Naturally I'm going to address the most important worldly news as of this moment: Kevin winning P.O.V. on BB11. If either he or Natalie wins BB11 I may end up with a bald spot. It's the same when two of the "Nerd Herd" people made final two awhile back. How frustrating!
ha ha, alright now to the funniest and most pathetic thing I've heard this week.
A central Pennsylvania man said he robbed a bank in 2007 to go to jail and get away from his overbearing wife. At a sentencing hearing Monday, 39-year-old Anthony Miller said he robbed a bank in Ephrata because he wanted to leave his then-wife but she had threatened to commit suicide if he did.
I guess the couple did get a divorce but SERIOUSLY. Is this how bad needy women are getting? That her husband would rather rob a bank and do jail time than live with her? SERIOUSLY?!!
Anyways, this was just a quick update to tell all ya'll that I'm too damn lazy to finish any layouts I've started for an actual domain so... this is it for now! Oh.. and... If you haven't played Sims 3 you should. Now.
Unfortunately, I can't make up my mind. I went back to posting on livejournal. =P
But I'll keep this for reading your entries if that's ok.
FRIENDS ONLY
I feel so.. icky today. I think I'm coming down with something - a cold, the flu and my stomach isn't feeling too lovely right now either. The weather isn't helping. It's windy, cold and it's snowing and raining off and on. As per usual, there's nothing for the stomach sickness. Every time I need it, we don't have it. I think I'm going to try and reach Jo's mom on her cell phone and have her pick something up on her way home. I want to do whatever I can to make sure it doesn't get much worse than it is now.
You know, I still remember what I have dubbed my "best Christmas yet". I was much younger than I am now and for months prior to Christmas, I was hoping and praying that "Santa" would bring me a Nintendo Nes system. Do you remember those? I can remember being almost to tears when I explained to my mom that there was nothing more that I wanted, other that it. I was on my best behavior for the whole year (as good as my best behavior got haha). Now that I'm older I think back to opening up that gift and seeing my very own Nintendo. Some of my close friends came straight to my house Christmas morning to play, though they didn't get much of a chance because I was somewhat of a hog with it!
I still have no idea where that system wound up. I think my parents ditched it after we moved some years later but I would love to have one of these again. It might be older but it was awesome! If you're looking to buy one yourself or other video games and systems, check out NintendosForSale.com. You won't be disappointed.
Well, the decorations have been laid out and are slowly making their ways to the windows, the walls, the tables, the shelves and various other places around the house. Once we're done with this, we'll start working on getting the tree up and decorated. The house is in a horrible state right now and resembles the look of a tornado coming through but in the end it will be worth it because it will be looking a lot more like Christmas. I have no idea how long this task will take, considering the huge amounts of Christmas decor Jo's mom has. I'm going to guess and say we may be finished by Thursday, HAHA.
It's nice though. I'm already in the spirit and we've already been playing Christmas CDs.
